Dear Reader, She knew. When my abuser was touching himself behind me on the living room floor watching a disney movie, while she sat on the couch. She knew. I a child. Knew the sound of him touching himself…and as an adult I still know that sound. So how could she not know? I knowContinue reading “Entry #44”
Category Archives: suspense
Entry #43
Dear Readers, Happy Mothers Day to all the moms who put there kids before themselves. To the moms who cried when they went to bed because they were afraid that they failed as a parent. To the mom who feels there childs pain at the end of each day. I spent the day trying toContinue reading “Entry #43”
Entry #42
Dear Reader, I am not sure what hurts more the fact that I was abused or the fact that I loved my abuser. The fact that even though he made me feel so low I also thought I could trust him. I’m not really sure how the mind of a child works when someone canContinue reading “Entry #42”
Entry #39
Dear Reader, I forced myself out of the house today. And I went to a MOPS meeting. And I spent the whole time trying not to cry because my everyday life is so intense. I kept doing everything this morning with the mindset of just in case. I got dressed just in case. I gotContinue reading “Entry #39”
Entry #38
Dear Reader, February 20th 2022 was an eye opening day for me. My morning started out with me trying to figure out how to message Angela about what I was remembering. Its important to realize that at this time I thought she cared about me and I wanted her help to get through these memories.Continue reading “Entry #38”
Entry #36
Dear Reader, Its this constant internal battle with myself. The part of me that loves, adores and misses my adoptive parents. And the part of me that knows they did wrong. That knows what happened nearly every day of my first 14 years of life was abuse. That knows they dont actually care about me.Continue reading “Entry #36”
Entry #35
Dear Reader, We often dont speak up when we believe or suspect someones been abused. Out of fear for our own lives and reputation we allow those people to suffer in silence. Its time to change that. I know its hard. To imagine that standing up for whats right could result in a backlash fromContinue reading “Entry #35”
Entry #34
Dear Reader, She keeps going to work everyday. My mom. Yea She keeps living life like everything is normal. When my whole world felt like it was falling apart. Shewas unphased. When everything I’d ever known crumbled right in front of me, she went to work. She didnt feel sorry for me. She didnt makeContinue reading “Entry #34”
Entry #33
Dear Reader, I’ve been a bit absent today. Because my mind has been free all day. I havent had a single moment of stress. No thoughts about my crazy life. I dont feal like Im living in reality. But this is my reality. This life is my new reality every day. Soon. The craziness, theContinue reading “Entry #33”
Entry #32
Dear Reader, I already blogged today. But something is on my mind that I feel the need to talk about. I look at my daughter. Shes 4 months. She smiles at me everytime I make Eye contact with her. She hardly cries and when she does I just want to make her smile again. ShesContinue reading “Entry #32”
Dear Reader, Love Ally 