Category Archives: blogging

Dear Reader, Its easy to warp the mind of a child. You have to be a really sick person to train there minds for your personal gain. You really do. I was groomed in so many ways. I was taught that I was to obey my parents. No matter what. For it pleases the Lord.Continue reading “Entry #31”

Dear Reader, Something weighing heavy on my heart today is that my adoptive “family” cant or just wont give me any answers. There is no telling me why. Anytime I ask its always just “I dont know.” For example. Why when I told my mother about the abuse did she make me confront my abuser?Continue reading “Entry #30”

Dear Reader, Wow. What a day today was! I woke up feeling pretty defeated after some personal conversations I had yesterday. But my boys woke up in the happiest of moods! And they really lifted my spirits. My oldest son, Eris gave me a big hug and said in his extra cute voice “I reallyContinue reading “Entry #29”

Dear Reader, I want to talk about pain… pain can make us do unimaginable things. Pain can make us harm ourselves mentally. Or physically. For example as a child I used to heat up sewing needles and press them against my skin because the pain of that…felt better then the pain i felt in myContinue reading “Entry #28”

Dear Reader, Days like today. When I feel like I can do nothing. Are the days my mind seems to run the most wild. My mind is filled with questions after questions. Yesterday my husband and I took the kids to the snow. They laughed and giggled and squealed with joy. I watched as ourContinue reading “Entry #27”

Dear Reader, I spent all night last night. In a never ending anxiety attack. An anxiety attach over this statement “I didnt rape her I just had sex with her” Thats what my dad said. 2 Years ago about when he was admitting to us what he did to his other victim. I just hadContinue reading “Entry #26”

Dear Reader, Today. I tried to only think about my children. I found myself caught up in the past only a few times today.. for a few minutes. And honestly. Its the first good day Ive had in a while. I want to keep todays mindset as possitive as possible as My day comes toContinue reading “Entry #25”

Dear Reader, A childs mind is fascinating. I look at my boys and realize how full of wonder they are. I want them to experience nothing but good. I want to protect there innocence and teach them how to love themselves. I didnt love myself. I didnt have any self respect for myself because IContinue reading “Entry #24”